The Peanut Aliens : explaining why fundamentalism is crazy

The following is my attempt to explain to a Christian fundamentalist why his beliefs about homosexuals, and anyone not following the literal word of the Bible, make him look like a batshit crazy wingnut.

Let me put it this way.

Lets suppose that I swore blind to you that you would be abducted by aliens unless you ate peanuts every single day.

You would ask why I believed that. I’d tell you that I’m part of a group that believe this, and that our founder was personally warned by an alien.

He wrote a book about it which we have faithfully copied; it should be noted that the early copies were made by farmers and labourers, so some errors crept in, and some pages were lost, but we have no idea where they are now because we have no originals, so we just duplicate everything as accurately as we can. Now I ask you – would you start eating peanuts every day?

Lets suppose you had a peanut allergy. I’d tell you to eat the peanuts, and you’d say you could not, as it would cause you great discomfort. I’d insist you must do it, or be abducted by the aliens. As time goes on, and I become more insistent, you continue to refuse, and my group begins to condemn refusal to eat peanuts as a a sin against the aliens, and your peanut allergy as a perversion.

You know that the peanuts will cause you pain, yet all these people are telling you you’ll be abducted, and that you are disordered. How do you think you would feel?

Because mark my words – my story about the peanut-loving aliens is more plausible that yours about a man that was killed and rose again in 3 days.

Your concerns for our souls may be absolutely sincere, but they are still based on utter unevidenced poppycock, and your refusal to acknowledge that makes you look crazy.

2 thoughts on “The Peanut Aliens : explaining why fundamentalism is crazy

  1. Dan Sweeney

    I’m a batshit crazy wingnut and I object to these fundamentalists stealing my mental health issues! Have you come accross the Cornish schismatics from the Pastafarians? They dont believe he has noodly appendages and have started calling themselves Pastyfarians instead.

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